Truth Or Dare
by exploding-penguins
Summary: The members of Team 7 are gathered to celebrate Naruto becoming hokage. What will happen when Naruto wants to play truth or dare? Implied SasuSaku and NaruHina.
1. Chapter 1

**This is a writing commission done for a good friend of mine, and she gave me permission to post it here. I hope you guys enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it!**

**I don't own the Naruto series.**

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"Naruto, slow down! You're going to choke if you eat like that!"

The blond haired shinobi continued to scarf down his ramen as if his life depended on it, paying his female teammate no mind. The members of Team 7 were all gathered in Sakura Haruno's apartment, enjoying a dinner prepared by the pinkette herself.

"The dobe doesn't eat his food, he inhales his food," Sasuke Uchiha said, eying his best friend in disgust.

Kakashi Hatake sighed at his students, the food in front of him remaining untouched. "Is that really any way to talk to our new hokage, Sasuke?"

Naruto finally finished his ramen, placing the bowl down and grinning at his raven haired best friend. "Yeah, teme! We're all here to celebrate my becoming hokage. You should show your leader some respect!"

"Leader, my ass," Sasuke scoffed.

"What was that, you asshole!?"

"If you two don't stop fighting, I'm going to beat the crap out of both of you!" Sakura exclaimed.

Hoping to diffuse the situation before it escalated any further, Kakashi chimed in. "Hey, Naruto… Since it's your big night and all, is there anything special you'd like to do?"

Naruto turned away from Sasuke and appeared to be deep in thought for a moment, before a foxy grin overtook his face. "As a matter of fact, there is. Let's play truth or dare!"

Raising an eyebrow, Sasuke regarded Naruto as if the blond was a child. "Truth or dare? That's an idiotic idea if I've ever heard one. What are we, five?"

"Sasuke-kun, be nice! Tonight is about Naruto. If he wants to play truth or dare, we should play along," Sakura scolded.

Rolling his eyes, Sasuke muttered something that sounded oddly like "annoying" under his breath, but didn't argue any further. Sakura smiled and grabbed an empty sake bottle that was sitting nearby, instructing everyone to sit in a circle.

"We can spin this bottle to determine who goes first. Alright, here goes," she said, spinning the bottle.

The four shinobi watched as the bottle spun before slowly coming to a halt, landing on their masked leader.

"Alright, Kakashi-sensei! Looks like you go first!" Naruto exclaimed, bouncing up and down like an excited child.

The silver haired man looked his students over, trying to decide whom he should ask. His eyes fell on the grumpy Uchiha, and he smirked under his mask. This would be fun. "Sasuke. Truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"Ha, Sasuke-teme is a wuss!" Naruto laughed.

"Shut the hell up and get on with it," the Uchiha growled.

"Do you have a woman you're interested in?" Kakashi asked innocently. He smirked as he saw the raven glance over at their pink haired teammate.

"I'm changing my answer to dare," Sasuke said, a faint blush adorning his cheeks.

"Fine then. I dare you to drink a whole bottle of something sweet," Kakashi said, having way too much fun with this.

'_Aw, shit. Bastard knows I hate sweets,' Sasuke thought._

"We shouldn't waste Sakura's food like that," Sasuke replied dryly.

The pinkette giggled as she got up from the floor. "Nice try, Sasuke-kun," she said, heading over to her kitchen. "I'm sure I have something good in here… Ah! Here it is!" she exclaimed.

Sakura happily made her way back to the living room, and presented the man she loved with a bottle of extra sweet chocolate sauce. "Enjoy, Sasuke-kun," she said with a wink.

"Woot, go Sakura-chan!" Naruto exclaimed.

Sasuke groaned and removed the cap from the chocolate sauce, reluctantly putting the bottle to his lips.

The Uchiha had to suppress a gag as the incredibly sweet liquid slid down his throat. He wondered how the hell people could actually like something like that. The sweetness finally overtook his senses, and he found himself trying not to throw up.

Watching the scene unfolding in front of them, the rest of Team 7 had to struggle to contain their laughter. It was just too funny watching the mighty Sasuke Uchiha have such a hard time with something as silly as chocolate sauce.

Finally, the Uchiha somehow managed to finish the bottle and put it aside.

"HA! Teme, you have chocolate sauce all over your mouth and chin! You look like a little baby that doesn't know how to feed itself properly," Naruto snickered.

Sasuke responded to his best friends comment by belching and blowing it in the blonds face.

"Ugh, you bastard!" Naruto exclaimed, waving his hand in front of his face. "Stop being an asshole and ask someone else truth or dare!"

"Fine, dobe," he ground out. "Truth or dare?"

"DARE. Because I'm not a pansy!"

An evil smirk came across the Uchiha's lips. Sakura and Kakashi looked on, wondering what their raven haired teammate had up his sleeve.

"What's with that smirk, teme? I can take anything you throw at me!" said the blond.

Sasuke's smirk widened, and he beckoned Naruto closer. Naruto hesitantly moved closer to the raven, and Sasuke whispered the dare into his ear. The blonds eyes widened and he jumped back from the raven, anger evident on his face.

"NO WAY I'm doing that, you Grade A douchebag!" he yelled.

"I thought you weren't a pansy," Sasuke smirked.

"I'M NOT!" Naruto exclaimed as he ran over to Sakura's freezer.

Sakura looked on in horror as Naruto proceeded to shove ice cubes down his pants. "Holy crap, that's cold!"

"NARUTO! What the hell!?" Sakura exclaimed.

The blond didn't answer her, as he began to run all around her apartment like a madman.

"**I eat shit for breakfast!" **he yelled, over and over.

Kakashi and Sakura eyed Sasuke, who was still smirking proudly.

"That was mean, even for you," Kakashi said dryly.

Sasuke simply ignored his sensei, far too proud of himself at the moment. Naruto finally finished running around the apartment, and went over to the kitchen to throw the ice cubes in the sink before returning to the living room.

"Damn, my balls are like raisins now! I am so pissed!" the blond boomed.

"Naruto, you do realize that you're the one that wanted to play truth or dare, right?" Sakura reminded.

"Yeah, yeah, I know," Naruto said.

"It's your turn to ask, Naruto," Kakashi said, feeling slightly bad for the blond.

Naruto grinned and immediately turned to Sakura, who gulped audibly. "Sakura-chan, truth or dare?"

"Hmm… I'll go with truth. These dares seem a little extreme for my liking," Sakura replied.

"Are you a virgin?"

The room went silent, and the rest of Team 7 backed away as they were sure that Naruto was about to get punched through the wall.

A fierce blush rose to the pinkette's cheeks and she glanced at Sasuke, struggling to find the words to speak. She couldn't believe Naruto had just asked her that.

"You freaking pervert! How could you ask me something like that!? I refuse to answer!" She sputtered.

"Oh come on, Sakura-chan! I know you and the teme have something going on! I just want to hear you admit that you've done the deed!" Naruto exclaimed.

"Shut up, dobe. That's enough," Sasuke said, utterly annoyed.

"We don't kiss and tell, you idiot," Sakura barked, before realizing what she'd just said.

'_Damn it, why did I just say that!? Now they know!' _she thought.

The rest of Team 7 simply stared at the pinkette. Neither her nor Sasuke were denying it. Naruto proceeded to groan loudly in disgust.

"Aw come on, Sakura-chan! Sasuke-teme!? You need to find a real man!" Naruto yelled.

"Real man? You're one to talk," Sasuke scoffed.

"What's that supposed to mean!?"

"It wasn't too long ago that I walked in on you and Hinata having sex. I didn't see anything of hers, but when you jumped off of her I got an eyeful of something I hope I never have the displeasure of seeing again. Seriously, how do you satisfy with that thing?"

Kakashi and Sakura proceeded to bust out laughing, while Naruto got so pissed that Kakashi could swear he saw steam coming out of the blonds ears.

"What the hell!? I satisfy my woman perfectly! What's with you making dick comments all of a sudden anyway? Who are you, Sai!?" Naruto barked.

"Maybe Sai had a point, you idiot!" Sasuke yelled.

"Asshole!"

"Dumbass!"

"**SHUT UP!" **Sakura boomed.

The blond and the raven promptly shut their mouths and looked at Sakura, who had the look of death on her face. The pinkette had her fists balled up, and looked as if she was ready to pound her teammates into oblivion. Kakashi, who had been looking on quietly, decided it was probably a good time to intervene.

"Alright, you three. Naruto and Sasuke, stop fighting. You're both being idiots. Sakura-chan, please calm down. I'm sure you wouldn't want to be stuck washing blood off of the walls," he said calmly.

Sakura sighed and closed her eyes, willing herself to calm down. She loved her teammates, but sometimes they drove her up the wall. She decided that she needed more female friends.

"Alright, I guess now it's my turn to ask," Sakura said, turning to Kakashi. "Kakashi-sensei, truth or dare?"

Kakashi had a feeling that this wouldn't end well for him no matter what he chose. He thought for a moment before deciding.

"I'll choose dare," he said.

Sakura smiled at him innocently, but Kakashi knew better than to be fooled.

"I dare you to take off your mask!" Sakura exclaimed.

'_I really should have seen that one coming,' _Kakashi thought.

"Nice try, Sakura-chan," he said, "I change my answer to truth."

Naruto frowned and jumped up, pointing an accusing finger at the silver haired man. "Hey, that's not fair! You can't change your answer like that!" he exclaimed.

Kakashi smirked under his mask, shaking his head. "You guys let Sasuke change his answer at the beginning of the game. Therefore, I'm allowed to change mine too," he said.

Naruto groaned and gave Sasuke a look. "Damn it, teme! If you hadn't been such a wuss and just chose dare from the beginning, we could have seen Kakashi-sensei's face!"

"Don't you pin this on me, dobe!" Sasuke barked.

"Shush, you two!" said Sakura.

The pinkette turned back to their sensei with a sigh. "Okay, fine. What do you look like under that mask of yours?" she asked.

"Well, I have a face," he replied.

His students collectively rolled their eyes.

"Be more specific, Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto exclaimed.

"I have a nose, cheeks, a mouth, and a chin," Kakashi smirked, having way too much fun messing with his students.

"You probably think you're being funny, but you're not," Sasuke said dryly.

"You wouldn't know what funny is if it hit you in the face," Naruto said.

Sasuke simply chose to ignore that comment, but couldn't resist rolling his eyes.

Sakura sighed and pouted at their sensei, hoping he'd break down. Unfortunately, pouting didn't work on Kakashi. "Please, Kakashi-sensei? Why won't you tell us what you look like?"

"Well, I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you," Kakashi joked.

Nobody was laughing.

Naruto had finally had enough, and he was determined to get that damn mask to come off. He was going to see Kakashi's face if it was the last thing he did. Without warning, he lunged for their sensei.

"GET HIM!" he yelled, trying to get his hands on Kakashi.

Sasuke and Sakura jumped up, also trying to catch Kakashi. Unfortunately for them, their sensei was too quick. Kakashi got up and jumped back, smirking under his mask. He loved messing with his students. However, he knew there was no way he could take all three of them at once. It was time to get out of there.

"Well, it's been fun, you three. Unfortunately, I think I hear Pakkun calling me. Gotta run!" he said.

With that, Kakashi disappeared in a puff of smoke, leaving his students standing in the middle of the living room.

"Did he seriously just pull that?" Sasuke asked to nobody in particular, annoyed. He'd never admit it, but he was just as curious as his teammates when it came to knowing what his sensei looked like.

"Damn it! I can't believe he did that! I really thought we'd see his face this time," Naruto said, disappointed.

"I know, right? I really wanted to see Kakashi-sensei's face as well. Hopefully one day it'll happen!" Sakura chimed in.

"So, what now?" Sasuke asked.

"Let's play more truth or dare! I want to embarrass you and Sakura-chan some more!" Naruto exclaimed.

Sasuke and Sakura shot Naruto a dirty look, and he knew to shut up before he got beat up.

Who knew truth or dare could be so extreme?

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**I hope you all enjoyed! If you did enjoy, please leave a review and save this story to your favorites!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello, everyone! I'm back with part 2 of Truth or Dare. I originally wasn't going to make a part 2, but I had writers block and was looking to some of the reviews on this story. I saw that some people wanted me to continue, so here I am! Now, I'm going to warn you. This is just... crack. I have no excuses. This is just so random and weird and I freaking love it. If you are easily offended, please leave now lol. This chapter kind of reminds me of a Seth Rogan movie. I hope you enjoy! **

**I don't own Naruto.**

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"That was a lovely festival! We'll have to do it again next year."

Sakura Haruno turned to her friend with a smile, taking a seat on the couch beside her. "I agree, Hinata-chan. The music and the lanterns were beautiful!"

Team 7, with the addition of Hinata, had just come back from the annual winter festival. The sun had set, but it wasn't too late, so everyone had made their way to the hokage's apartment. Now the group was trying to figure out how to spend the rest of their night. A few suggestions had floated around, but an agreement had yet to be reached. While the group discussed possible plans, Yamato headed to Naruto's kitchen to retrieve the sake he'd brought over.

"Ooh, ooh! What if we watched a movie?" Naruto suggested excitedly.

"That's an idea. How about a romantic comedy?" Sakura replied.

The blond made a face at the medic, not keen on that idea whatsoever. He was a man, damn it. He didn't want to watch some cheesy movie. "I don't want to watch some chick flick!" he whined.

"Not all romantic comedies are chick flicks!"

"I'm going to have to agree with dickless on this one. Romantic comedies usually end up being chick flicks. We should watch a horror film," Sai chimed in.

Naruto ignored the incredibly obnoxious nickname and nodded. "I'd be down for a horror film. We can watch Friday the 13th!"

The artist shook his head at the blond, smiling his fake smile. "I was thinking of something more along the lines of Human Centipede."

"Tch. You _would _want to watch that garbage," Sasuke muttered.

Naruto made a face and pointed an accusing finger at the artist, horrified by the suggestion. "HUMAN CENTIPEDE!? Are you crazy!? You're… you're sick!"

Hinata sighed from her seat on the couch. The suggestion appalled her, but it was nothing to argue over. She loved her boyfriend, but he could overreact at times. Hoping to calm the situation before it escalated any further, she chose to speak up. "Naruto-kun, please calm down! We'll eventually agree on a movie to watch. There's no need to insult anyone over their personal preferences…"

The Uchiha rolled his eyes at the Hyuga. "Yeah, who wouldn't want to watch some psychotic bastard jack off with sandpaper?"

Sakura looked over at Sasuke, staring at him blankly. "Sasuke-kun, how would you know that?"

"I lived at Orochimaru's lair for a few years. He's one sick son of a bitch. I've seen some shit."

"_Anyway, _Hinata is right. Everyone has their own tastes, and it's no use getting upset over. If we can't agree on a movie, we'll have to figure something else out," Kakashi reasoned, effectively changing the subject.

Yamato returned from the kitchen with two packs of sake, setting them down on the table. "What if we play truth or dare?" He asked.

"NO! The last time we played truth or dare, it didn't end well whatsoever!" Sakura exclaimed.

Naruto nodded quickly in agreement, shooting his raven haired teammate a look. He still hadn't forgotten what that bastard had made him do the last time they played truth or dare. "Yeah, Sasuke-teme over here made me shove ice cubes down my pants and chant stupid stuff," he growled.

"With ice cubes down your pants, your balls must have shrunk to the size of raisins. Oh, wait… they're already the size of raisins."

Hinata gasped, heat quickly rising to her cheeks. "S-Sai-san! There's no need to b-be so vulgar!" she scolded with an intense blush.

"**YOU ASSHOLE! **Fine, let's play truth or dare! I want someone to dare you to do something humiliating! We'll see how you like it!" Naruto screeched.

Sakura shook her head at her teammates bickering, but she was secretly excited by the turn of events. She'd pay to watch Sai get put in his place. She considered him a dear teammate, but he was an asshole and needed to learn a lesson. Just then, an idea struck her. The medic smirked wickedly. She'd make this more fun.

"Just to make this more interesting, how about we take a shot of sake every time someone completes a dare?" Sakura suggested.

This brought a huge grin to Naruto's face. Drunk truth or dare was the best truth or dare. This was going to be interesting indeed.

"Oh, hell yes! I'm in!" the blond exclaimed.

"Tch. I'm against the idea. What's the point in getting wasted and being stupid?"

"What's the matter, Sasuke-teme? Worried you won't be able to hold your alcohol like a _real _man?" Naruto challenged.

The raven glared daggers at his best friend and growled, officially riled up.

"You're on."

Once everyone agreed to truth or dare, Kakashi took an empty sake bottle and placed it on the floor. Everyone sat in a circle, and the masked man spun the bottle to determine who would go first. If he was being honest with himself, he thought this was a terrible idea. However, it sure would be fun to watch his students and their friends make fools of themselves. The thought made him smirk under his mask.

The bottle slowly came to a halt and landed on Sakura. The medic smirked and sized the group up for a moment, before finally turning to Yamato. The brunette didn't like the look on the medic's face, and he gulped.

"Alright, Captain Yamato. Truth or dare?"

"Dare," he answered hesitantly.

The medic nodded and looked around the room for inspiration, before spotting a bag of chips laying on the ground. They certainly looked like they'd been sitting there for a while. She grinned and reached for the bag, presenting it to Yamato.

"Eat a handful of these."

The group snickered at the look of repulsion on Yamato's face. Why in the world would Sakura dare him to eat chips that have been sitting around for who knows how long? She was a medic, surely she knew how unsanitary that was.

"Um, Sakura-chan… A-Are you sure that's safe?" Hinata questioned shyly.

The medic seemed entirely unconcerned. "I'm sure they're just stale at the worst. Even if there _is _mold or something, I can always heal him if he shows signs of distress," she replied coolly.

Yamato sighed and reluctantly took a handful of chips from the bag, shoving them into his mouth. At first, it wasn't too bad. As Sakura had stated, they were just stale. That is, until there was a loud crunch. Suddenly, a juicy substance made it's way onto his tongue and Yamato proceeded to flip out.

"T-That was _**not **_just chips! I think I just bit into a roach! Ugh!" he exclaimed, wiping his tongue on his sleeve in an effort to get rid of the taste.

Sasuke turned to his blond haired teammate with a glare. Naruto wasn't just an idiot, he was a slob too. The Uchiha had no idea how the blond could possibly live in his pigsty of an apartment.

"Clean your damn house. I have no idea how you can live like this. I'm getting claustrophobic surrounded by all of this crap," Sasuke muttered.

The Uzumaki looked offended, as if his apartment was some sort of holy grail of cleanliness. "What are you talking about!? My man cave is perfectly clean!"

"Clean, my ass! This place should be condemned as a health hazard!"

"Why would dickless want to clean your ass, traitor?" Sai asked.

"Will everyone just calm down and take their shots so we can continue the game!?" Sakura screeched, wanting to get on with it already.

Suddenly, Naruto stopped his yammering and a foxy grin overtook his features. A realization dawned on him, and he looked at his silver haired sensei with delight.

"Wait a minute, if we all need to take shots, that means you have to take off your mask!" he exclaimed.

The jounin grinned under his mask, shaking his head at his student. He wordlessly reached into his pocket and pulled out a freakishly long bendy straw, placing it into his shot glass and maneuvering the other end down his mask. The group simply stared at the man in wonder.

"I carry bendy straws with me everywhere I go for such occasions," he said.

Everyone could do nothing but face palm. Choosing to move on from Kakashi's antics instead of getting upset, everyone simply took their shots. Yamato then turned to the silver haired jounin and asked him truth or dare.

Putting his shot glass down, Kakashi looked at Yamato confidently. "I choose dare."

"Better not dare him to take off his mask. You won't have any luck," Sakura muttered to no one in particular.

"I dare you to do the booty jiggle dance," Yamato said.

Everyone simply stared at the man blankly, having no idea what in the world the booty jiggle dance was.

"What in the world is the b-booty jiggle d-dance?" Hinata asked with a blush.

"You know! It's the thing all of the young girls are doing! The dance where you put your hands on your knees with your butt in the air and you jiggle it!" Yamato exclaimed, as if that would clear up everything.

"Yeah, because that explains everything," Sasuke muttered.

The brunette sighed and tried to think of a better way to explain what he was talking about. Suddenly a light bulb went off in his head and he turned to Sakura with a smile. "It's the dance Ino does whenever she goes clubbing!"

The medic's eyes widened and she resisted the urge to laugh out loud. "You mean _twerking?_"

Yamato nodded quickly. "Yeah, that!"

Kakashi groaned loudly, realizing exactly what the dance was and not excited to perform it whatsoever. He was going to look like a complete idiot. The jounin made a mental note to get back at Yamato for putting him through his torture. Finally he got up, turned around, put his hands on his knees and started twerking his ass, failing miserably.

Not even Sasuke or Hinata could resist laughing at the sight before them. The great Kakashi of the Sharingan was standing in front of them, twerking his thirty year old ass off. It was surely a sight to see.

Once he was done, the jounin sat back down with a huff. He wasn't pleased whatsoever. Naruto was still laughing hysterically, and it took him a minute to collect himself. Finally, the blond pointed to his sensei with a snicker. "Geez, Kakashi-sensei! You really don't have the ass for twerking!"

"Thanks for looking," Kakashi replied without missing a beat.

"Way to go, dickless. I always knew you were gay," Sai chimed in.

Naruto growls and turns to Hinata, giving her a look. "Oh, believe me. I'm definitely _not _gay," he retorted, winking at the Hyuga.

The girl gasped and blushed cutely, giving the Uzumaki a look of her own.

"You two can stop making bedroom eyes at each other now," Sasuke barked.

The group again took a shot, with it now being Kakashi's turn to ask. He turned to Sasuke with a smirk. "Truth or dare, Sasuke?"

"Dare."

Naruto applauded loudly. "Woo hoo! Way to go for not being a pansy this time, teme!"

The Uchiha simply rolled his eyes and chose to ignore the comment.

"I dare you to wear a pair of Naruto's boxers on your head for the rest of the game."

Sasuke saw red. "Go. Fuck. Yourself."

"They don't have to be dirty!" Kakashi countered.

"They'll be dirty no matter what! Have you _seen _this dump!? Look around, Kakashi!" Sasuke hissed.

"Stop insulting my man cave! You're bruising my ego, you asshole!" Naruto yelled.

The raven growled and got up, marching over to the blonds dresser and going through the drawers until he found what he was looking for. He placed a pair of blue boxers on his head and sat back down with a growl. "There. If I get a disease from this, I'm blaming you," he spat, crossing his arms.

Once again, the group took a shot. Sasuke turned to Sakura and asked her if she wanted to pick truth or dare.

"Ehh.. I think I'm gonna go with truth. I'm starting to feel buzzed," she replied.

Yamato raised an eyebrow at the girl, genuinely surprised. "That's pretty surprising considering who your teacher is," he remarked.

The medic simply stuck her tongue out and glared at the man.

"Alright then. I'll go with the stereotypical question. What is your most embarrassing moment?" Sasuke asked.

Suddenly, the medic turned green. She gasped and put a hand to her mouth, feeling sick to her stomach. "Right now…"

She barely got the words out before she stood up and ran to a nearby trashcan, puking her guts up. Sakura coughed and sputtered, groaning and looking just plain miserable.

Team 7 and Hinata gasped, all of them pretty concerned about their friend. "Sakura-chan! Are you alright!?" Naruto exclaimed, jumping up and running over to her.

The medic groaned but nodded, wiping the side of her mouth with the back of her hand. "Yeah, thanks… I think it's just a stomach bug," she said.

"I think you're just a lightweight," Sai commented.

Sakura growled at the artist, rinsing her mouth out with water before returning to the circle and sitting down.

"Sakura-chan, we can stop the game. We don't have to keep playing," Naruto said softly.

The pinkette shook her head, glaring at Sai. She was going to teach him a lesson. "No, I'm fine. I want to keep playing!"

"As long as you're sure…" the blond replied.

With that, Sakura turned to Sai with the look of death on her face. "Sai. Truth or dare?"

"Dare. I can take whatever you throw at me."

The medic smirked wickedly and reached into her medical pouch, taking out some pills and presenting them to the artist. "These are laxatives. They're extra strong. I dare you to eat these," she hissed.

"What is it with you and making people eat stuff? First me, now Sai?" Yamato asked.

"S-Sakura-chan, I know you're angry with Sai and his comments. But, don't you think t-these dares are slightly cruel?" Hinata asked quietly, hoping to dissuade Sakura.

The artist shook his head at the Hyuga, taking the pills from Sakura. He _did _say he could take anything she dished out. He wasn't about to back out of this. He refused to give her the satisfaction of making him admit defeat. With a new sense of resolve, he took the laxatives, chewing them rather than taking them with water.

The medic smirked at this. "You'll start feeling those bad boys soon," she promised.

After everyone took their shot, Sai turned to Hinata with his fake smile. "Truth or dare?"

"Daaaaarrrre," she replied with a hiccup.

Naruto gasped and looked at his girlfriend in concern. "Um, Hinata-chan? Are you drunk?"

"I'mmm **hic** fiiiine. Let's do thiiiis!"

"I think that last shot did her in," Kakashi said.

"It won't be too bad. I dare you to make out with dickless. I want to see if he actually enjoys it," Sai said.

"Hey! I am **not **making out with my girlfriend when she's drunk and unaware of her actions! Especially not in front of- WOAH!"

Naruto had no time to finish his sentence, as Hinata took it upon herself to shamelessly straddle him. The alcohol coursing through her veins made her incredibly bold, and she wasted no time covering his lips with her own. The kiss was messy, but passionate and Naruto couldn't help but pull her closer.

Quickly coming back to reality, Naruto gently pushed Hinata away, panting heavily. "T-That's enough, Hinata-chan. You're drunk," he said softly, blushing.

"But Naaaaaruto-kuuun!" Hinata whined.

"Wow, I guess you do have a dick after all!" Sai exclaimed, pointing to the blonds obvious boner.

The Hyuga turned to the artist with a grin, nodding eagerly. "Yep! And it's aaaaaalllll miiiiiiineeee!"

Naruto's eyes widened and he blushed fiercely. "Hinata-chan! You're not drinking anymore!"

The group, minus Hinata, took their shot and the Hyuga looked at her boyfriend with a smile. "Okay, Naruto-kuuuun. Truuuuth orrr dare?"

"D-Dare?" he replied hesitantly.

"I dare youuuu toooo… kiss me againnn!" she grinned.

No sooner did Hinata finish her sentence before she projectile vomited. By some miracle, she managed to avoid hitting anyone. Naruto's things however, weren't quite as lucky.

"Why am I not surprised that she's a messy drunk?" Sasuke muttered.

"Shut up, you asshole! I'll get you some water, Hinata-chan!" Naruto exclaimed, bolting to his kitchen for some paper towels and water.

Suddenly, a horrible smell filled the room. Everyone looked around, determined to find the source of the odor.

"Oh, geez. What the hell died? It smells like crap in here!" Yamato exclaimed.

"Oh, fuck…" Sai muttered before dashing off to the bathroom in horror.

Sakura could only grin evilly. "Naruto, you might not want to go in there for a while. He's going to _destroy _your bathroom."

It was then that Kakashi and Yamato shared a look, agreeing that enough was enough. Upon watching Naruto tend to an incredibly drunk Hinata, and listening to pained groans coming from the bathroom, it was clear that things had gotten out of hand.

Sasuke simply sat on the floor, watching everything unfold with one thought in mind.

'_I'm surrounded by fucking idiots.'_

* * *

**Well, there you have it. Again, I have no excuses. I wanted comedy and this is what my brain came up with, lol. If you enjoyed, please leave a review and save this to your favorites! Also, let me know if you want me to continue. If you do want me to continue, what would you like to see? Who knows, maybe I'll make this a series of fuckery. Thank you for reading!**


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